One of my first introductions to Buddhism came when I stayed with some friends in Vermont.

During the day I’d hike, and at night peruse their bookshelves. The book I went back to most was about Zen, and what pulled me in most were all the poems from ancient monks, with their firsthand accounts of their mountain retreats.

Finding Daily Zen brought me back in their company, and it’s been part of my morning routine for five years. The passages are like letters from old friends, guiding us to the path. How to find it, how to stay on it, what to do when the path disappears, and how to flow with it when you disappear.

A few years ago I had a long bout of health-related anxiety. There wasn’t actually anything wrong with me, but the doctors weren’t sure and ordered a whole series of tests.

I read a lot about anxiety and how to work with it, and through it all, Daily Zen was there, offering insights on how to be calm and clear. How to accept what feels unacceptable. And most of all, how to let go.

When the anxiety hit, I wouldn’t be able to remember what I’d read. All my research would go poof in a cloud of fear. So I made a list of tips and carried it with me at all times. And at the end of it I put this poem from Daily Zen, for it summed up all I’d learned.

This body’s existence is like a bubble’s;
May as well accept what happens.
Events and hopes seldom agree,
But who can step back, doesn’t worry.
We blossom and fade like flowers;
Gather and part like clouds.
Worldly thoughts, I forgot long ago
Relaxing all day on a peak.
– Stonehouse

That sense of releasing our grasp on how we want things to be, to accept and let go even of the wish to be, and to do it not out of closing down, but simply relaxing into what is… that was so key. Six hundred years later, mental health pioneer Claire Weekes said much the same when she wrote that the best attitude towards anxiety is “Whatever.” But the masters said it first.

The final test the doctors had me go through was a catheterization, where they open a vein and push a little camera into your heart. Did wonders for my anxiety in the weeks before. And that month’s Daily Zen journal finished with this:

Stay centered and true.

I copied that onto my list, too, and I repeated “Stay centered and true” to myself as I was being wheeled to the operating room. Because that phrase summed up what all our guides have taught us – to stay on the path, centered in your own knowing, without veering off into fear. And just as importantly, Daily Zen reminded me that no one is alone, there’s help all around us, and we’re all walking each other home.

The anxiety slowly went away after I got the all-clear, but things can still knock me off my center at times. And in no small way has Daily Zen guided me through. Not only the quotes and journals, but it’s introduced me to so many teachers, and I’m grateful for these gifts of wisdom.

Grateful,

Steve C